My Head Hurts!

Oh My God! LOSTIES

Will they all start having bloody noses?!?
For anyone that watches Lost, WOW!

The scene on the phone was AWESOME!

But are they all in jeopardy of going crazy?
I love Pen and Des!
Aye, Brotha!

Rules of Enjoyment

Wow those Oscars were BORE-RING! Must every actress be so beautiful and perfect that there is no discerning one from the other? Um huge, fish tail dresses were all the rage! Boring… Cate Blanchett you may have left Oscarless, but you remain to always be a true original, always beautiful, always artistic, and always smashing.

Diablo Cody, on the other hand; you looked like a cheap whore, but I applaud you for staying true to your roots rather than getting Oscar-fied.

Wait, she kind of looks like someone I know… uh-ho.

Can anyone tell me why Cody’s Juno was even the indie Oscar cutie in the first place? And why the praise for Ellen Page? She acts like a one-dimensional 40-year-old. I really don't get Juno. It was cute, I did enjoy it, but was it original and worthy of Oscar buzz? No.

For a fun, original movie, the screenwriter that I really think should have won is Nancy Oliver for Lars and the Real Girl. If you haven’t seen it, maybe because you were too busy waiting in line for Juno, then I’m telling you when it finally hits the rental shelves, rent it! It’s quirky, poignant, funny, and full of great performances, especially by one of my wonderful, boyfriends, Ryan Gosling in the title role of Lars! I Love, Love, Love this movie!

Another wonderful movie that got shunned by Oscar is Julian Schnabel’s The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.
I know I have mentioned this movie before, but for those that may not remember, this is adapted from a memoir by Jean-Dominique Bauby, the editor of French Elle, who, at the age 43 suffered a stroke that left him paralyzed with only the ability to move one eyelid. I know it sounds depressing, but when you put artist Schnabel behind the project, I’m telling you, you will not be bored or feeling too blue. It’s moving, yes, but also visually compelling and really gives you the sense of Bauby’s horrible fate through beautiful imagery and a look into Bauby’s imagination and memories.

Speaking of visual… Back to the glitz and the gowns for just a minute.

Trainwreck, oops, Tilda, good job on your fantastic part in Michael Clayton, sparkling little fun personality you have there, but dear me how you made the media weep when you won. For your hair, your face, and oh dear goodness me, that dress alone do not make gossip mag cover page material.

Like with many of the evening’s speeches, I simply had to turn my head. Deer in headlights accepted their awards, while nervous actors presented, except Ms. Blanchett of course: have I mentioned she’s perfect? The night was indeed filled with many huhs? Like why did the producers not feel the need to clean up what ever was on the floor? Don’t they know who these people are!? Why does Calista like old, angry farts? How does crap, like the Bourne movies get nods, let alone wins?

How is it that Heidi Klum always looks so phenomenal that the question of why she is even there is not a question?
I’d be curious to hear thoughts on Atonement, There Will Be Blood, and No Country For Old Men. Of course, here are mine! Let me preface by saying, shame on me, I haven’t yet seen There Will Be Blood, and it’s both of my boyfriends’ movie! Paul Thomas Anderson wrote and directed it, while my other boyfriend Daniel starred in it… delicious. It’s the one movie I couldn’t get to in time, but I have seen the trailer numerous times, and saw the Charlie Rose interview with Anderson and Lewis. I was really rooting for these guys to win!

I am actually surprised There Will Be Blood and Anderson were DA-NIED! I say this because the Cohen brothers just don’t seem so deserving to me. Okay first, when you win that gold statue freak the hell out like Marion Cotillard or the absolute adorable Once Wonder Twins. Don’t stand up there like you not only expected to win, but you also expect past wins, futures wins, and wins that aren't even in your category. Like I can see that one real fuzzy-haired Cohen throwing a mean tantrum for not winning the 2008 Figure Skating World Cup Champions. On the flip side, if they were filming this Henry Kissinger film at MSP, then they are just weird enough to get away with their arrogant eccentricity, I suppose…

Now second, was the movie really that great? Um did anyone else think that maybe cowboy Brolin should have just packed up his cute wife, that stash of cash, and move to Mexico PRONTO? Why stick around? Why go back with the aqua? If he hadn’t gone back with the aqua he would have been that much better off. Maybe it’s a lesson in stupid cowboys? Anyhow, sexy Chigurh was worth the chase! Well Cowboy Brolin isn’t too bad on the eyes either… All and all I just think a movie with a powerful performance by my Daniel, in a movie about oil, is way more prolific for receiving top honors than some cowboy flick. Am I wrong? Oh and can someone tell me why Woody from Cheers was there?

Okay I will stop the cowboy bashing and move on to a little story about tragic love…. Aaah Atonement. Where do I begin? Let’s see, first my instant gut reaction when the movie was over was that of absolute livid anger… no not directed at pretty Kiera, okay yes a little at that ugly, snotty little girl, but really my anger was for the RUDEST, most selfish woman sitting next to me; a woman I have named Clueless Blond Bitch.

Okay it’s that time in the post where we are going to have a lesson in movie-going etiquette.

Rule #1
Shut your pie-hole, only open to occasionally chew popcorn, twizzlers, and chocolate SOFTLY. All right you can also enjoy a healthy snack softly as well, but know that most people will hate you for being so healthy and perfect.

Rule #2
Turn off the cell phone—the whole phone, not just the ringer. Your bright cell phone screen on for texting a friend is just as distracting as any noise that phone will make.

Rule #3
Leave all children at home, unless you are seeing a PG rated flick. Period. Kids under 13 do not belong in teen or adult rated films. They will hate you, be bored, and cause noise that will be upsetting to other patrons.

Rule #4
When setting up your movie-viewing station, try and leave the seat next to you open for others if you’re noticing the theater is getting full up!

Rule #5 (this is where things start getting good)
If you are late to a movie, anywhere from 1 to 15 minutes, and it’s fairly obvious the movie is full up, sit at the closest possible available seat. Yes, your seat will be crap, but that is what you get for being late, idiot.

Rule #6 (And this is why I loath Clueless Blond Bitch)
If a 7:20 movie has begun, and you arrive at 8:45 do NOT dare decide to go to that screening; for one you will be incredibly disruptive to people that are engrossed in a movie that is well into its storyline; and, secondly, you don’t deserve to see a movie if you are not willing to see it from the beginning.

Now if you decide you are the only person who is worth anything and you are going to basically crash the movie, then here’s another don’t: Don’t walk up the stairs of a stadium theater, spy a seat, 14 seats a way, and proceed to walk in the aisle, all the while saying ‘Excuse me, excuse me, oh sorry! Excuse me! Sorry, ha excuse me!’

This is what CBB-yup that’s Clueless Blond Bitch—did! Now you’d think the drama was over, except the seat she spied was next to me, and full of two heavy winter coats from the gentleman on the other side of the seat (I call him Candy, because he had like 12 bags of candy). Now, aside from the coats; my purse, a bag of popcorn, and Candy's shopping bag also blocked the seat. CBB, true to her name, cluelessly barged through and jovially asked, ‘Is this seat taken?’

Mind you, on the big screen, our young, strappingly good-looking hero has just been showcased in the five-minute film shot on Dunkirk beach. So you can imagine I am shocked, and soon livid.

Candy angrily moves his belongings while CBB squats her bum into the heads of the people in front and her idiot stick figure is a vision of selfishness to those behind.

You’d think that drama would be over, but nope, CBB then proceeded to chomp chomp chomp her popcorn in my ear throughout the rest of this heavy, sad, and moving film. Chomp, chomp, chomp—oblivious to anyone but her own self! I was livid. Turns out Candy was livid too and when those credits rolled, instead of Candy and I having a deep, inward feeling of ‘wow, that was some movie’, we both began to berate CBB, who remained clueless.

Now a word about paying the ticket vs. sneaking in, and the theater’s role in the situation: Candy was certain she snuck in, which he believed to be the real issue; I said whether CBB paid or not, you don’t disrupt patrons that are an hour and 45 minutes into a film. CBB was astonished we’d have a problem with her rude behavior. Disgusted Candy and I exited with our movie partners leaving CBB in the dust, maybe, hopefully a little less clueless. But the question remained: did CBB sneak in or pay? Well I spoke to the ticket sellers later and stupidly they sold this woman a ticket. I said, “So you’re telling me, one hour and 45 minutes into a movie, a movie that was nearly sold out, you sold a ticket and didn’t think that it may be disruptive to other patrons?”

‘Yes, it’s money we can’t turn her away’ was the 20-year-old ticket sellers' sad, pitiful response.

So instead of learning about the dangers of snotty, precocious children, I learned about snotty, selfish moviegoers, and the fact that theaters are all out for a dollar—yes, I know, duh! But still that doesn’t mean I’m not going to be writing a letter to that theater!

Which incidentally means this post has come to a close; I’m going to speak my peace! Happy movie going!

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

My brain is frozen. My arms are frozen. My fingers are frozen. This is all about what's on my mind these days. That and, well let's see...
—Last week's Lost was AWESOME, I look forward to this evening's episode!
—Miss. H is doing better.
—Aspartame is the devil.
—My friend Mandy is making me laugh.
—Poor Foxy E just lost her family dog.
—At Valentine's, my Mom and friends treat me really well.
—I want to be a host on a cheesy game-show
—Work is busy.
—If super hot Josh Brolin would have just left town with the money, there would have been no movie.
—A better movie that deserves way more attention: Julian Schnabel's The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.
—Saw a great improv show; motivated me to start up a new session of classes come April.
—Victoria Beckman is Mayjah.
—The peeps contest has come to Chicago and I'm giddy with excitement; what will I create!?
—New York City makes me happy.
—I could live on chips and salsa alone.

The truth is, I'm just way too frozen to really think these days.... and busy on deadline..more soon, I promise!

Hmmm Red Food

So for New Years 2008, my resolution was to learn about Apples. Unfortunately, I didn’t take on this task as fully as I hoped, and now just normally choose Gala Apples while shopping—they're tasty, and hey, I do enjoy a good, shiny red food.

While I will continue to pay attention to what types of apples I do choose for eating, which is a lot more than I did back in old 2007, as an addendum to my resolution I will learn to make the perfect beet salad—another delicious red food!

Hmm I love beets. They are blood red and delicious, especially nummy when sprinkled with lemon juice and fresh goat cheese. Above is a pic of my owls overlooking my latest beet salad dressed with olive oil, salt, pepper, and lemon juice.

I vow to eat more red apples and beets, and eventually, actually, eliminate red meat, and chicken, and pork, and any other animal meat from my diet by 2009. Like those owls, I will not eat those owls!

Soon after I will eliminate dairy and then veggies and then sour patch kids....

P.S. Speaking of things that are red…Miss. Honey’s heart is doing really well. She is on meds and eating like the little kitty horse that she is… this makes me so happy.

One VERY Important Day

Today is a VERY important day. Today, February 11, Ms. Marilyn Jean—my UBER cute mother—came squacking into the world. She is so pretty, smart, kind, calm, generous, and funny. Whenever I am crazy, I think 'how can I be more calm, sweet, and patient like my cute mom?'

Right now her sisters and Mother have created a party for her at the 'clubhouse,' complete with her favorite pizza and a homemade cake. I wish I could be there. She is probably opening up some really cute presents right now as I type.

On the right is one of my favorite photos of my mom because it's so 1960's chic, one of my favorite fashion eras! Check out that beehive! Amy Wino watch out, this is how you wear a cute do!

Happy Birthday Mom!!

For more on my cute mom, click here to read last year's birthday post.

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Happy Chinese New Year of the Rat!

Or, in Chinese, Gong Xi Fa Cai!

To find out your Chinese Zodiac sign, click here.

I'm a Tiger! Grrr. Being a Tiger, according to the astrology, means I'm quite emotional, but feisty and stubborn! Yowzers!

Miss. H is a rat—so it's her year. But, of course, it's weird if you think about the fact that Miss. H is a cat and she, I'm sure, has ate a rat—back in her outdoor days—so is the Chinese Zodiac punishing her now with this heart condition? I sure hope not. I think that Honey feels really bad about that, oh wait she just meowed sorry.

So there you have it Chinese Zodiac, Honey says she is truly sorry...so hopefully this year, since it is the year of the rat, Honey will be forgiven and will live a long, happy, and healthy life.

Meow Meow and, of course, squeak....... Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Drama and The Big Apple

For the past four days I have been in one of my favorite cities, New York, New York, the town so nice they named it twice....well that's how that saying goes, even if it doesn't make sense.

I went there for the New York International Gift Fair (NYIGF): Good times. Unfortunately the night before I left, Miss. Honey made it clear she was quite sick.

Frank, being such an amazing friend, brought her to the vet the next day. And while he got her help, sadly still I couldn't enjoy the city as much as I normally would if I had a healthy kitty back home—basically I was worried sick the whole time. Luckily there are some pretty wonderful people in the industry that really helped me get through it!

And, of course, knowing she was in good hands and now on medication, I certainly had to enjoy myself a little, after all wasn’t I in the city that just won some major sporting event?

Yeah so Superbowl Sunday in the world of gift was quite crazy. The night ended up being spent at a special charity event, an event that included a performance by Broadway star darling Sutton Foster! Eek!
Ms. Foster won a Tony for her performance as Millie in Thoroughly Modern Millie, and last year I saw her in the starring role of The Drowsy Chaperone—Too much fun!

While the charity event included Sutton's performance, special presentations, and a private auction, the game did make its way on the flat screen televisions. The real excitement of the game came after the win, it involved fighting mobs of people for an available cab. After an hours wait, an industry friend and I were on our merry way to a fun, spinning spectacle of a bar.

On Monday I worked the Javits and ogled over the most decadent gifts and paper products—going to a gift show is quite similar to shopping with no money—you see a million lovely things you want, but can't have—of course times that experience by 10 at that is a gift show!

That evening, my boss, co-worker, and myself were treated to a lovely dinner as the guests of some VIPs. Later we were taken to the theatre for the new Broadway MEGA-HIT Legally Blonde The Musical.

Like OMG, my co-worker Mary and I were like LOL like the whole time! Like hello, whoever said Wicked was the new Cats was seriously disturbed because Legally Blonde is where it's at, and FYI, Elle Woods is my new BFF! Was that TMI!? OMG, BRB.

Okay, now that I got that out of my system...

Today, I met with my super cute friend Sonja for lunch. Sonja lives in Queens and works on Park Ave. in Manhattan—she is really adorable, and she 's a great writer! Do check out her blog Life in NYC.

So suffice it to say I do still love New York even if Miss. H was ill, but it wasn't easy as she was on my mind a lot, but now that I am home I must go give her more pets and snuggles.

C-U L8TR!